Parents Just Don't Understand

Dear MOMZ,

Your baby should NOT have a Facebook page. Thanks.

Love,
Cara

Love of My Life

Dear EHarmony,

You say you will meet the love of your life...how about the psycho of your future???

Love,

Rayer Marie

Law Abiding Citizen

Dear Murphy's Law,

Who passed you anyway?

Love Always,
Bert

Dear Universe,

Reason #145 of why I can't stand kids: STROLLERS - what the f***?

Love Always,
kg

Hamsters are Make-Believe

Dear MSN,

Today's Picks:
How do I tell my kids their pet hamster died?

Answer: You tell them it never really existed.

Love,
The Universe

Freeway BaNaNaS!

Dear Man in a Banana Suit on the Freeway Overpass,

GET OFF THE FREEWAY OVERPASS!

Stop yelling and screaming crazy, incoherent things, because it is creating a major traffic jam. Jam don't go with bananas! Peanut butter does, in case you couldn't put that one together. Also, now I have that bananas in pajamas are coming down the stairs song stuck in my head. THANKS A LOT BUDDY.

Love Always,
Raye & Louise, on behalf of everyone that was on the 101 S freeway headed towards downtown LA around 7pm on 9/9/09.

How Bout Dem Apples

Dear Organic Apple,

You are gross.

Love,
Katie

The Big 3-0

Dear Universe,

I’m 30… now what?

Later,

rayer

TACO DEATH FOREVER

Dear Universe,

I want to eat tacos
crunchy
soft
salady
ALL OF THEM

Love Always,

The Day After Thanksgiving Folks

No Cabbie Control

Dear Cab drivers,

Please learn to drive since it's your job. One should be able to take a cab without getting run over, running over someone else, enjoy getting from point a to point b without hitting every damn curb.

Love Always,

anon.

Back that THANG up!

Dear Lady in line behind me,

Please take a step back, you are too close! No one can get in front of you, the ropes are here to prevent that. I can hear you breathing and I hope that you can read this as I type it into my phone...BACK UP!!!

Love Always,

anon.

Dear Universe,

Please help me to not stalk people on Facebook.

Love Always,

Rayer Marie & Louise